We Did Not Know What Was Coming Series: The Antidote to Powerlessness
To say the last seven years have been a journey of growth for me and this country is an understatement. To help me process and cope with the roller-coaster of emotions I have felt these years, I started writing on Medium right after the 2016 election. My last series ended December 31, 2020, after Biden won the presidential election.
Recently I realized I missed writing “in my journal” and decided to go back to the very beginning and re-read my essays. I wanted to see where I started out on November 9, 2016, and where I am now. I decided to repost my favorite blogs with a short present-day commentary and continue onto current times.
I hope a few of you will join me on this journey of recollection, reflection, and learning. I feel such compassion for this country; little did we know what we were headed into. There is still so much uncertainty ahead — the journey is far from over.
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The Antidote to Powerlessness: Nov 26, 2016
Powerlessness is a terrible wound to the soul because it traps an individual in the role of victim. Powerlessness on the part of the victimized also allows perpetrators to do very bad behavior without consequence or incentive to stop their bad behavior. Since the election I have been thinking about the antidote to powerlessness which is taking action. Taking action may be something small that says no, enough, stop, I disagree. It can be something huge like leaving a marriage, quitting a job, or filing a lawsuit. It can be enormous like starting a business, running for office, or joining a movement.
I find for me it helps to start small. On November 9th, I was in total shock that Hillary Clinton lost the presidential election. To be precise she won the popular vote; as of November 25th she was leading by more than 2 million votes and there still are uncounted ballots in California, Utah and the state of Washington. I could not believe this country elected a man who had never held a public office, who showed disregard for women, African American citizens, Hispanic people, Muslims, the disabled and his own Republican party. A man who bragged, “I could stand in the middle of 5th Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn’t lose voters,” How could that be?
That day I took the action step of joining the American Civil Liberties Union and pledged fifty dollars each month to support their amazing work. The next day I booked a flight to Washington DC for a march scheduled the day after the inauguration to advocate for the legal rights of all people in this country as guaranteed by the constitution. The day that followed I ordered a copy of the United States Constitution so I could better understand how the three branches of government work. That same day I started writing this blog. The next I wrote to New Balance and asked them to put their public rebuttal of white supremacists using their shoes as a way of identifying each other on their home page for all consumers to see. The next day I wrote to Bill Ford, the CEO of Ford and thanked him for publicly rebutting Trump’s lie that he (Trump) kept the Kentucky car plant from going to Mexico. That plant was never leaving. These are all small steps taken so I do not fall into despair; so I do not feel powerless. I would encourage everyone in distress over this election to take a positive action step every day to express their concern over a violation of rights and deeply held values of decency.
But honestly, I do not think the small steps are going to be enough in the coming days and weeks. I went back to Jesus, Gandhi and King. These guys did big things and I reflected on their strategies. I am old enough to remember Martin Luther King and the marches in Birmingham (1963) and Selma (1965). I was 10 and 11 years old when I sat in front of our black and white television and watched history unfold. My childhood memories are blurry. I remember watching lots of African American men, women and children walking peacefully down a sidewalk or street. There were white people in the group as well. I remember policemen turning water hoses on those people knocking many down — including the children. I remember scary looking policemen in gas masks running after and hitting the marchers with clubs. I remember horses running into the crowd of marchers. I just did not get it. Why were the police doing these things — acting so mean? The people were quietly walking, some holding hands, some singing. They weren’t doing anything bad.
Well I get it now. The marchers were asking for the right to vote; they were asking for the same equity and fair treatment their white brethren received in the eyes of the law and this country. The white power establishment would have nothing to do with giving anyone who was a different color the same rights. As I was writing this piece, I stopped and went to YouTube and watched actual footage from those marches. I wept. Please go and watch them for yourself. Google ‘Selma Birmingham civil rights marches YouTube’ ; a number of video clips will pop up. I suspect you will be deeply moved by the purposefulness, dignity and non-violence of the marchers. I suspect you will be horrified by the actions and words of the politicians and police.
This is where I stopped writing last night. I went to bed with a heavy heart but also deeply moved by the courage and conviction of those marchers. When I woke up and started reading the November 20th morning news on the Internet, I had a moment of déjà vu. On Highway 80 outside the town of Pearl, Mississippi there is a billboard displaying an image from the “Bloody Sunday” conflict on Edmund Pettus Bridge in Selma, Alabama. Trump’s campaign slogan “Make America Great Again” is written over it. Paid for by an artist-run super PAC called For Freedoms, founder Hank Willis Thomas said in an interview with the Pacific Tribune, the billboard was meant to start a conversation and point out that America was great when people fought for what they believed in.
Well the billboard has started quite the discussion in the area and state and most of it is angry. When initially interviewed by local news Pearl Mayor Brad Rogers told reporters the billboard didn’t violate any laws or city ordinances and since it was “not vulgar” it is protected by freedom of speech. Well something changed because now Mr. Rogers is asking the sign be taken down. I wonder what will happen. I am really curious if this billboard could have started some meaningful discussion in the small town of Pearl about the genuine state of affairs in the town, the state of Mississippi and the country. Maybe it already has and I just do not know that.
At ten and eleven watching the television, I knew something bad was happening to people who didn’t seem to be doing anything wrong. I felt sad and scared but did not have a clue what I was supposed to do about what I was seeing. The great news about being older, wiser and awake is that I know I have to stand up in every moment and say no to hate by taking positive actions whatever the size. Opportunities will present themselves; I pray I will have the courage to step into them.
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Commentary: 10/30/2023
I am filled with thoughts after reading the above essay. Actually I feel jumbled. When clients feel that way, I encourage them to do stream of consciousness talking — say whatever comes to mind. I think I will do the same.
I continue to hold fast and true to the belief that action steps big and small are the antidote to powerlessness. I will say I remained steadfast for years in carrying out the actions described in the article above. I am so sad to say that seven years later I am burned out.
I live in Washington DC. There are marches and protests every day. The ones against the injustices of trump, magas and white supremacists are so much smaller these days. People — including me are exhausted. Whereas I attended each and every one of them for years after trump came into office, I find that since the George Floyd marches, I am far more selective. I wonder about their efficacy at this point in time.
I continue my political donations to organizations like the ACLU and candidates I support. The donations are smaller.
From 2016 to 2018 I wrote daily postcards to Republican House members and sent daily emails to Republican Senators protesting trump’s actions demanding they stand up to his lies and violations of law and decency. I stopped that in 2018. Instead I joined PostcardsToVoters in 2018 writing to Democrats across the country encouraging them to go to the polls and vote for Democratic candidates at all levels of government. But where I used to write 500 postcards a week, I now write less than 50.
I watched CNN and MSNBC all day/every day after Hillary lost. I got sick. Literally I got physically sick with anxiety and fear. I do not watch either channel now, rather I read select news outlets on the internet to control my anxiety. I will say that I closely follow very important events like the January 6th hearings. I am also currently consumed with the New York case brought to Judge Engoron which may dismantle the trump organization.
I feel sad writing these words. I feel ashamed writing these words. I have observed (correctly or not) that extreme right-wing folks are relentless and never stop pushing their agendas and actions. I have observed (correctly or not) that Democrats get tired and slow down their efforts to push back. That scares me and I sincerely hope I am wrong.
Last week a dear friend attended a discussion group in Chicago where David Axelrod interviewed Rachel Maddow. Maddow ended the talk by saying that 2024 was going to be a very challenging year for democracy. She pleaded with the audience saying every person who cared about this country had to do something — however small — each day, every single day to work to get people in office who stood for the individual rights of all people regardless of color, race, faith, sexual orientation, and gender. She encouraged everyone who believed in social justice to speak out against the ultra-right movement in this country on a daily basis.
I am haunted by her pleading. I know she is correct. I know that as tired as I am, as burned out as I am, I have to dig deep and find the energy to go back to my early action steps. I am not a runner but I feel like I am in a marathon headed to the finish line and praying my legs won’t give out. I know I am not alone in those feelings. I think many Democrats, Progressives, Independents and principled Republicans feel the same way. I hope we don’t give up before we cross the finish line which for me is the 2024 election.
In my stream of consciousness thinking this morning, I just realized this marathon does have a relay race component which gives me hope. Whereas I am tired, I am also excited by our Gen X, Gen Z and yes, our Millennial voters. They have the energy and passion we so sorely need. At least I think they do. I just need to do my part in handing off the baton to these young folks. This is related to my final thought this morning.
I cited the Civil Rights marches in the November 2016 post above. Yesterday (as synchronicity would have it) I attended a powerful play with a friend. It was Mountaintop. Martin Luther King is visited by the Angel of Death in Memphis; she has come to take him home after he has made his final speech supporting Memphis sanitation workers. In the final moments of the play, she allows him to see into the future. He is both moved by the leaps made in civil rights and deeply saddened by how far we must still go as a country. The Angel of Death makes the point that MLK was a powerful force in the “relay race” and to have faith his work would continue to bear fruit.
To go from the metta to the micro, I am going to make another cup of coffee and write my five morning postcards to Democrats in Volusia County Florida encouraging them to re-enroll in vote-by-mail so they are ready for the 2024 elections. Every day I wonder about the people receiving these cards. I wonder what they think seeing this simple handwritten message encouraging them to vote. I wonder if any of them are moved to action or if the card will go into the garbage. I wonder even if they vote will their one democratic vote in Florida make a difference. Bottom line, the outcome is not in my control. My taking action is.
This morning, in this moment at least, I have come full circle. I feel a tiny bit less jumbled.
